Possible reasons why I’m in such a good mood today:
- I started taking vitamin D three days ago on a whim and it has finally built up in my system enough to enhance my mood significantly. (Totally unscientific, I did not even bother to google that)
- The skies are cloudy and gray, which puts me in the mind of my Oregonian youth.
- I accidentally didn’t leave the house for almost two days straight.
- I sobbed, wept, and whimpered last night.
- I opened a letter yesterday that said my health insurance would cost approximately twice as much as I was anticipating during my sabbatical year, leading me to sit in stunned silence on the couch and repeat, à la Gob Bluth, “I’ve made a huge mistake.” (Totally unrelated to the crying, ahem)
- I drank too much wine last night. (Totally unrelated to the health insurance thing, ahem)
- I drank too much coffee this morning. (Totally unrelated to the wine thing, ahem)
In other words, nothing really makes that much sense. I should be feeling terrible, but instead I feel calm, light, free, optimistic, pleased, inspired…happy. I’ve felt this way all day, and so far, no crash. I can think of no explanation. There clearly isn’t one. Even the most desperate influencer wouldn’t try to sell those 7 reasons as a recipe for happiness (surely!). No, this is a feeling that can only be noticed and appreciated, not attributed. As Kurt Vonnegut taught me to do shortly after he died in 2007, I can only stop and say, “If this isn’t nice, I don’t know what is.”
If I’m the only person responsible for my own happiness, well, I’ve got some questions.